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By Becky Reno

I stood in front of my students on the last day of the very first class I taught. I had this group of soon to be social workers for 10 weeks, and tried my best to convince them that a. the world isn’t fair and b. they can and should do something about it. I struggled, searching for words that would somehow impart all the hard earned wisdom I’ve grudgingly gathered over the years, in my last three minutes with them. The best I could do was beg them “remember that everyone is doing the best they can at all times. Including you. Even if it doesn’t seem good enough, it is.”

That’s the thing with our theme this past month- work: we’re all doing it in one way or another. We all have to get there, whether we’re talking about the physical journey or an emotional one.

Our work might have started as a way to pay the bills, and along the way turned into a family (sometimes literally).

Some of us are doing the work of welcoming a new member of the family or the daily drudgery that comes with them.

We’re taking on the division of work in a marriage and the work of maintaining marriage.

Then there’s that work that involves putting ourselves out there, and the need to drop the never ending judgement.

I wanted my class to understand this. That we’re all doing this work, or some semblance of it, every day. Every. Single. Day.

If I would have had about 2 more minutes with them, I think I would have taken a deep breath, and imparted this last bit of stoic wisdom on them: “let your freak flag fly.”


This is what I’m hoisting up on a stick. Apparently I’m the last woman under the age of 74 to use a shower cap.

Here’s the thing. In addition to doing the best we can, we’re a bunch of damn weirdos. Every single one of us. I’m so damn tired of trying to stifle that part of myself in order to try to appear to be some version of “normal” so I can (unsuccessfully) dodge the judgment raining down from others. I’m determined to embrace my aberrance and you’re going to help me. For the month of May we’re celebrating some of the little, and big ways that we all deviate. I’ve spent just enough time with this fantastic group of women to assure you- you’re not going to want to miss this.

Grab that flag of yours and join us, won’t you?

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  1. Laura Yurs #
    April 30, 2012

    “Let your freak flag fly!”
    After a month of work, it only seems appropriate!
    Let the wild rumpus begin!

  2. lifeineden #
    April 30, 2012

    The older I get, the more I realize that EVERYONE (adults and kids) are just all sorts of F-ed up. We’re all freaks, dysfunctional, flawed, damaged — you name it. So why not just embrace it.

    Oh this is going to be a good month!

    • lifeineden #
      April 30, 2012

      ps — I loved the title for this post!

  3. April 30, 2012

    Ditto what Laura said!! Start waving them now!

  4. April 30, 2012

    I would like some more info on the shower cap usage. specifically, at which point you started wearing one and do you use it all the time? LOL

    This next month of deviate is going to be craaaaaazy good. I can’t wait to read/laugh/gasp/cringe/relate ;)

  5. April 30, 2012

    My roommate (20 years old) wears a shower cap :)

  6. May 2, 2012

    I try to catch my almost 12-year-olds flying their freak flags because I know all too soon they will hide them away. Trying to hang mine out again. Though sometimes, I don’t have to try.

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