Second only to our children, I’d argue that music has had the biggest impact on my marriage. It sounds odd, but in its way music has been responsible for more fights and for more interruptions than anything else. Now to just give the drawbacks isn’t fair, music has also been a contributing factor to push both of us to chase crazy dreams, it has kept us closer to the side of weird in the normal spectrum (I am counting this as a positive), and it makes me respect my husband immensely.
Funny thing is, neither of us plan an instrument and we couldn’t carry a tune to save our lives.
Let me explain. My husband is a illustrating, silk screening, rock poster artist. (Believe it or not this is a thing). He hand sketches then inks the drawing, tweaks it digitally, then pulls anywhere from three to five colors per print through the silk screen. If it sounds time consuming, it is. I’d say in a good week he averages about five hours of sleep a night. Oh, and did I mention he also has a full time job to put me through school?
Despite my love/hate relationship with this (see the fights above), I couldn’t imagine it any other way. In their own way, I’d honestly say that these rock posters have been one of the defining forces in our marriage.
They are not just a hobby, rather they represent a commitment to a dream, an acquiescence to a force compelling us to do something we are drawn to, even when it flies in the face of logic. It might not make sense from the outside- the amount of work and sacrifice that have gone into these (and other pursuits) over the years- but nobody said that passion should be tethered to reason. I wouldd rather spend a lifetime chasing down a dream than any portion of that giving up on one, and I can’t imagine being with anyone who felt differently about that.
Where do you stand in terms of your own dreams. Are you in hot pursuit? Are you playing coy, flirting with them across the bar? Or are in your own damn way, conjuring up all the reasons you can’t make it work?